“Next on our open mic…Sabina!!”
I grabbed the crumpled sheet of paper at my feet and stood up, practically tripping over the emcee as I walked up to the stage.
“This is my first time reading,” I said, and the crowd responded by cheering and waving their “Muppet Arms” excitedly in the air, a tradition at the Portland Poetry Slam. “I turned 19 on Thursday, so I wrote this.”
And I proceeded to read 18 Things I Learned at 18, modified for a spoken-word poetry format.
I’ve been going to the slam since high school, but I’d never performed anything both for lack of writing and a lack of confidence about sharing my work.
Thanks to blogging, I’ve gotten a hold on both of those, but the slam is another animal. After all, reading something highly personal out loud to a large room of strangers is slightly different than writing something fairly objective or surface-level and publishing it in a low-profile corner of the internet.
I didn’t feel particularly nervous. I don’t consciously fear public speaking, unlike many people who would rather die than get on stage.
My body disagrees though. It fears public speaking like no other. After the third sentence, my body took over. My voice was shaking, my muscles were twitching, my heart was pounding, and my palms were profusely sweating.
But my mind was calm, focused on nothing but the piece’s rhythm and the audience’s harmony–snaps and hums to signal their identification with my words.
At the end of the piece, the audience burst into applause as I proudly smiled and walked cautiously back to my seat, hugging my best friend in congratulations and trying to return my heart to a normal pace.
I conquered my first poetry open mic, and I can’t wait to go back for more.
For more of my Firsts series, check out First Visit to Michigan or read a guest post: First Job Post-Graduation.
Victim to Charm 
That was very brave. Congratulations. I’m a pretty confident public speaker now but I could never have done that at 19.
Susan Says
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Thanks Susan!
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This is so cool! I also love slam poetry so the fact that you had the confidence to go up there and deliver it is amazing. I’m nowhere near brave enough for that but it’s so cool that you are. Fantastic post!
xoxo
Hannah
http://frecklesandolives.blogspot.com
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Thank you Hannah! It’s definitely tough to get up there but it was amazing.
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Congratulations! That sounds like a wonderful first time experience. Keep at it, you must be a natural.
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Thanks Robin! It does seem to come relatively naturally to me.
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Congrats on your first poetry open mic!
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Thanks Marlynn!
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Very brave… I’m glad your heart and mind were able to tame your body. that’s a lot of self control on top of that bravery to share something personal with the outside. And I thank you for the morning smile from your description of Muppet Arms.
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Muppet Arms definitely have a way of calming down first timers, not sure why.
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Great job. What an experience! I bet it will get easier each time you stand up to speak.
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I think it will too, Tracy.
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COOL! I’m glad you had so much fun :)
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Thanks Lizzi! I’ve never been one for much of the limelight but I did have a great time.
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Good for you – Congrats! Like many things in life, it gets easier with practice.
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It definitely will get easier and I’m excited to share my work again.
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Congrats. I love how you are always stepping out of your comfort zone. Here’s to your next open mic!
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Thanks m’dear!!
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You are so brave! Way to put yourself out there.
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Thank you, Allison!
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My legs always quiver when I give a presentation. My trick is I keep moving around so that legs never have time to shake and make Me more nervous.
Congrats!
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I don’t want to move TOO much though, since then it’s distracting. Thanks!
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