If We Were Having Coffee (Injury Edition)

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that January has not been kind to me.

It started off joyously, with old friends and a feeling of satisfaction about how I spent 2014.

Then came a minor injury, followed by oral surgery, followed by an 104 degree fever, followed by wisdom teeth complications.

If the physical ailments weren’t enough, I had a pretty serious quarter-life crisis that made me reconsider everything I’ve been planning about my future for the past three years. IMG_4156None of my decisions were safe from my torturous confusion: my choice in college, my choice to even go to college at all, my choice in major and minor.

 The school dilemma wasn’t enough either. I decided to end things with the person I was dating, and while I’m 100% glad I did it, breaking up with someone can be as rough as being broken up with.

Then classes started, which meant an additional level of stress. I wasn’t exactly looking forward to this semester, but I wasn’t dreading it either–except for the workload.

Then injury struck again, this time rendering me fairly immobile. I’m on crutches, and while the X-rays of my knee came back normal, I have to see an orthopedist to find out exactly what’s going on.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that I’m really trying to stay positive.

I’m laughing at how enormous my swollen knee is to distract myself from how much it hurts. I’m focusing on how helpful people have been, both strangers and friends (special shoutouts to my roommate Viv for being a patient roommate/caregiver/mom and my honorary roommate Matt for being a crutch/chauffeur/moral support).

I’d also tell you that sometimes it’s hard.

The pain is constant. My injured knee, of course, but also my entire upper body that has to do all the grunt work of traveling around my hilly, snowy campus on crutches. Beyond the physical exhaustion, IMG_4174I haven’t been sleeping through the night, since even the slightest movement can wake me up in discomfort.

I’ve been answering the question “how are you?” with something besides “good” or “fine” for a change. Now it’s “I could be better,” and often, “I could be better, but I could be worse.” Both of which are true. The latter is my own personal pep talk to remind myself that even though being injured (especially under my circumstances) is awful and inconvenient, I’m hanging in and doing what I can.

I’m not used to relying on people. I’ve always been self-sufficient, both by need and by choice. Now I find myself relying on people for basic things–taking my caddy into the shower, getting a glass of water, making mac & cheese–has been hard for me. I’ve found that I’m surprisingly much better at asking for help than I am at accepting when it’s offered. I’d much rather have an active role in getting my needs met than a passive one.

If we were having coffee, I’d tell you that even though January has had more downs than ups, the high points have been amazing. 

My friends and I had tickets to see my favorite band, Wild Child, play at The Dock in Ithaca. It took place the day after I destroyed my knee, but I managed to snag a barstool at the venue so I could sit in between one-legged dances. We all had an incredible time, and my friends left the venue as Wild Child’s newest fans.

The other highlight of IMG_4109January was throwing Viv a luau-themed 20th birthday party in our dorm room, which was the perfect mixture of low-key and high-energy. The decorations (streamers, a “luau” sign, and leis for everybody) were festive, the menu (Hawaiian pizza, fruit punch, and pineapple upside-down cake) was spot on, and the games (Cards Against Humanity and that “what celebrity does the Post-It on my back say?” game) were a hit. We got really into the party planning and it inspired us to host more themed get-togethers. Viv even asked if we could have a party to celebrate George Washington’s birthday in February.

Then, as always, I’d ask what you want to discuss over coffee, hoping that you’d tell me that your January was better than mine.

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24 thoughts on “If We Were Having Coffee (Injury Edition)

  1. I love “If We Were Having Coffee” posts! I’m so sorry to hear your January is has been so rough! Mine has been a little rough as well, but I definitely see how it could be worse. Besides family matters, I was doing alright until I fell down ONE step in an auditorium class Full of new classmates. Finally got off crutches, so I’m sending love your way! Promise to prop that sucker up as much as possible, do your ice/heat rotation!
    xx
    Phoebe at Taken By The Lapels

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    • Me too! And the crutches struggle is the worst. I’m icing and elevating for sure–I don’t have a way to do heat. Glad you’re recovered and thanks for your good wishes!! :)

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  2. I would say that from now on you’re only allowed to go out covered in bubble-wrap for your own good. How you gonna take over the world on one leg and little sleep?
    All kidding aside, what a run of crappy luck, eh? But the universe has a way of evening this stuff out over the long run. My suggestion: Feb 1st, go buy a lottery ticket!
    In the meantime, here’s hoping for a speedy recovery and no serious damage to that knee.

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    • I don’t know–I might have to put world domination on the back burner for a bit!
      It’s funny that you mention the lottery ticket, and you’ll find out why very soon.
      Thanks for your well wishes! I’ll be keeping you all posted.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Oh it’s a great one.
      You write a celebrity (or character or animal or whatever) on a Post-It and then stick it to your friend’s back, then they have to ask questions to guess who it is. Best played with a large-ish group so you can circulate around and ask different people. We had 10 people and that was the perfect amount.

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  3. How did you hurt your knee? It really seems like you’ve grown so much in the past year. It sounded like January was an eventful month but you learned a lot and there were good things that came around it. I like to think about the silver lining of things.

    this is random but I feel like college is a great place to grow and mature. I personally haven’t really dated but I’ve learned a ton about myself and others. I’ve made some of my best friends in college and learned a lot from jobs and internships.

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    • I fell and twisted it–possibly tore my meniscus, but not sure yet. I have grown a ton in the past year, I’ve been through a ton of change and I’m really happy with where I’m at now mentally. I definitely feel the same, that I’ve expanded my understanding of both myself and others through various relationships with friends, professors, etc.

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  4. ooof, I’m sorry you keep getting hit blow after blow! The year can only improve at least. Glad your remaining positive. Relying on people or asking for help is never easy- nor is breaking up with someone at a time when you need those things more than usual. So bravo for not taking the easy way there.

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    • That’s what I’m trying to tell myself, that things can only really go up from here. And I think the breakup was the best thing I did all month, even though it was tough, because I wasn’t getting the support I needed and it was causing me more stress than joy. Let it go, you feel?

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  5. I’ve had a loonnnggggg month. It could have been better but hey, it could have been way worse! I had a fall…landed with all of my considerable weight on my knee. It has taken almost three weeks for it to feel better. It’s still somewhat sore but I know how knees are I’ve also had six surgeries on my other knee through the years. So yeah, it could be worse. I hope February brings you healing, the end of pain, and lots of good things!

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  6. Pingback: Something Awesome This Way Comes | Victim to Charm

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